Welcome to Aquarius season. Things are apparently going to get weird.
Like the uncompromising Capricorn that we just left, Aquarius is ruled by Big Daddy Saturn, but allied with the revolutionary Uranus, they turn that critical eye inwards and begin to purge what does not work, with gusto.
With Aquarius comes a deep desire to question everything around you, to take nothing at face value, including yourself. If you don’t necessarily have the strongest sense of who you really are, that might come with discomfort and even real pain. This week’s Full Moon in Leo rushes in with perfect timing to balance this confusion with a reminder of You.“Self-expression and the recognition of their expression is a central to [a Leo's] identity. They know themselves through their performance and when wisely attuned, the gift of Leo is revealing that we are all performing, so why not choose what role we want to play?” ~Alexis J Cunningfolk
Aquarius reveals to us that, “You are not who you think you are.” But Leo adds,”You are so much more.” Leo reminds us that we are not wrong in our sense of self, but simply limited, by Ego, by oppression, by mental illness, etc.
“Every man and woman is a Star,” says goddess Nuit, channeled through Aleister Crowley’s wife in 1904. Sunny Leo bursts into our wintery gray landscape to make sure we don’t forget this.
Leo sees its ruling Sun as a spotlight, bringing into the light everything that makes them them. At their best, everything and everyone is celebrated, whether judged “good” or “bad” by the Ego, spotlight shared and redirected graciously. At their worst, that spotlight can increase the space between Who We Think We Are and the vast Truth of Self, becoming more of a tunnel down which to spiral, dramatically.“Leo brings heart medicine, features what is fun and feels that putting self-expression first in importance is self evident. Leo can err on the side of self-indulgent, sure. Leo has been guilty of finding pleasure in Divadom, yes. Leo passionately pleas for pleasure. But, why not?? Leo needs to prove itself worthy of heroine status by demonstrating its strength, its regal nature and its formidable courage. Leo may play pussy cat, but its swat is full on lioness and not to be messed with.” ~Chani Nicholas
One way we can side step the Ego on our path to our Truer Selves is to circumvent all we’ve built up about ourselves by accessing our most untouched aspects, our Inner Child; this is my favorite of the themes contained within the Planetary trump of Leo’s ruler, (you guessed it) The Sun, Key 19.
Working with the Sun card, we have a direct route to the space within ourselves that remembers life before the trauma and self-consciousness. Or if it doesn’t, we are presented with an opportunity to heal that space and create the inner child we never got to inhabit, one that is cared and provided for, that knows how to trust and to experience the wild, boundless joy only capable so close to incarnating.
This full moon in the Sun’s home sign, just as Aquarius season is gaining momentum, reminds us that reparenting is possible. Sometimes in order to get to the end we must return to the beginning. There is a kind of time travel in Inner Child work, a return to moments of wounding to give ourselves what we couldn’t access at the time. But it can also be as simple as returning to the headspace of a toddler opening a brand new coloring book. Have you felt that kind of awe and possibility in the last 10 years? Probably not.
Aquarius says that we need not settle or accept anything that does not align with what we seek. It knows that a more perfect world is possible. Leo says, I am that perfect world. Just kidding, but Leo reminds us that we are an intrinsic part of it. And when we put them together, we can return to a time when we were already perfect, before anyone convinced us otherwise, and reclaim that feeling, taking it back with us into adulthood. Leo says, “Remember, you are already everything you ever needed to be. You are more than enough.”
To build on the themes of the Sun card, I offer you a spread to inquire where in your life you can bring in more joy.
1)What brings me joy?
If you want more specificity, what is something that brings me joy that I’ve been avoiding or ignoring? If you get a “negative” card, either look to the “reversed” meaning of the card (say the release of grief and integration of loss in 5 of Cups) or consider how that “negative” theme gives joy to your shadow, or creates situations that satisfy your shadow desires (eg. you love arguing and pickings fights with 5 of Swords because it tends to lead to passionate make up sex). Go deep!
2) What stops me from experiencing joy every day?
3) What is one thing I can do to foster more joy in my day to day?
4) Message from my Holy Guardian Angel.
This may be a short spread, but you have the option to go deep here and really confront the reasons Joy may feel out of reach. So settle in and journal it out! And remember, you can always pull more cards for clarification if the message isn’t getting through. Ok, lovelies, I’ll leave you with that! If you want to check out the full length guide, featuring a plant profile on Hawthorn, an exclusive recipe for my anxiety blend Tender Tachycardia, and a ritual for commuing with and honoring your Inner Child, go to my Patreon and sign up for the High Priestess tier or abover for $10/mo!
Give yourself a big hug and remember Winter isn’t forever, and neither is whatever you may be feeling right now.
In Love and Magick,